


Crawl Home to Her

by Dearly_Divided



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Established Relationship, F/M, Ghost John, Ghost au no one asked for, Grief/Mourning, Haunting, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Jacob is soft, Some Fluff, Supernatural Elements, kind of guardian angel, more of a drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-03
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-04-07 06:18:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19079218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dearly_Divided/pseuds/Dearly_Divided
Summary: “Can you see him, Jake?” she asked.Jacob hummed and she felt him press a kiss on the crown of her forehead. “Yeah, pup. I see him.”He might have been lying to comfort her, Rook wouldn’t have put it past him, but when she lifted her eyes to meet his gaze she found him staring at the silent figure in the room.The same silent figure that had been haunting Rook for the past two weeks.





	Crawl Home to Her

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what this is, but enjoy?

Rook shuddered as the wind howled outside the door to the cabin. The fire was going strong, but there was no warmth in the room. It felt cold and unwelcoming, despite the four blanket that Jacob had passed to her. She knew the iciness in her bones had nothing to do with the temperature, and so did he.

She watched with wide eyes as Jacob returned from the kitchen, passing her a bowl of something hot – soup she realized, before settling himself onto the couch beside her.

He didn’t say a word as he threw his arm around her shoulder, pulling her up against his side. Rook didn’t mind, not even when his fingers started to trail up and down her arm, either to comfort her or as an attempt to bring some warmth back into her cold skin.

“Can you see him, Jake?” she asked, putting the bowl down on the coffee table in front of them. As delicious as it smelled, Rook didn’t exactly have much of an appetite these days.

He didn’t reply, instead shuffling slightly so that she was curled up closer against him.

Rook felt her stomach sink.

She  _was_  crazy. She knew it, he knew it, and Joseph and Faith probably knew it too. She was broken, damaged beyond repair. She’d snapped and all that was left for her was pity from the family who’d once welcomed her with open arms. Tears, painful and bitter, welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks silently.

Jacob hummed and she felt him press a kiss on the crown of her forehead. “Yeah, pup. I see him.” 

He might have been lying to comfort her, Rook wouldn’t have put it past him, but when she lifted her eyes to meet his gaze she found him staring at the silent figure in the room. 

The same silent figure that had been haunting Rook for the past two weeks.

Still, a small amount of relief swept through her, easing the tightness in her stomach. Jacob saw him too. She wasn’t losing her mind.

“I think he hates me,” Rook mumbled. Why else would he be there, if not to torment her? He never spoke, not a word, not even when Rook had fallen on her hands and knees and begged him. He just watched her with those big, baby blue eyes of his. He was a ghost, nothing more.

Jacob huffed, a sound halfway between a laugh and a scoff, tightening his hold on her. “No, honey. He loves you.” His voice was surprisingly gentle, softer than she’d ever heard him speak. 

But the look on John’s face didn’t speak of love. His expression was blank, but those eyes of his, the beautiful blues Rook had too often found herself lost in, those were full of pain and despair.

Outside the cabin, the wind howled louder. 

Rook just shook her head, burrowing it into Jacob’s shoulder. “No, he blames me. It was my fault he died and now he’s punishing me for it.”

Jacob stilled. A moment later his fingers were on his jaw, forcing her to look up and meet his stormy gaze. “It was _not_  your fault, pup. _No one_ blames you. He knew exactly what he was doing, and you know damned well he’d do it again. For that matter, so would I. He was protecting you.”

But Rook couldn’t help but look back at John, at the three bloody wounds in his chest. 

“Those bullets were meant for me.”

“Do you honestly think he’d want it to be the other way around?” he asked.

Rook shrugged, “He’d be alive.” It was a fair trade in her eyes. John deserved life, he deserved a happy ending. She didn’t.

“And you’d be dead! If you think for one fucking minute that John would ever come back from losing you –“ he cut himself off with a frustrated growl. “You can’t see the changes you brought about in him, because you didn’t know how fucking empty he was before you came along, but _we_ did. You gave us our brother back. If he lost you, if _anything_ happened to you, it’d destroy him. He loved you more than he ever loved anything in his entire life, Rook.”

“We were fighting, when it happened. Do you know what my last words to him were?”

“It doesn’t matt-“ 

Rook cut him off with a cold, humourless laugh. “I told him to go fuck himself.” 

Silence hung heavy in the air between them, and once again Rook found herself turning back to John. If it weren’t for the bloodstains and gaping wounds on his chest, she could almost imagine that he was really there with her. Every time she looked at him it felt like someone was cleaving her heart in two, but the thought that she might turn around and he wouldn’t be there was somehow even worse

“He hates me, I know it.”

Jacob abandoned his own bowl of soup to wrap both of his arms around her. “John couldn’t ever hate you, pup. I don’t know or understand why he came back, or how, or any of it, but I know it aint me or Joseph he’s watching over. He hasn’t left your side, has he?”

Rook shook her head. Wherever she went, John followed. 

“I don’t think he’s haunting you, sweetheart. I think he’s protecting you.”

She hadn’t even realised she was crying until Jacob brushed her tears away with his thumb, giving her a sad smile. “I miss him, Jacob. I just want my husband back,” she whimpered, trembling in his arms as she sobbed. 

Jacob just held her tighter, kissing the top of her head. “Me too.” 

The ghost in the corner of the room just stood and kept watch. 

Hour later when Rook had cried herself to sleep, Jacob had gently picked her up and carried her to bed, taking the time to tuck her under the thick, warm covers. He didn’t hear John follow them, but the weight of the burning stare on his back told him that he’d followed them up into the bedroom. 

Jacob didn’t bother turning around, instead he took a seat on the edge of the bed, watching over his charge.

“Why won’t you just talk to her?” he asked quietly.

There was a soft sigh, barely noticeable between the howling of the wind outside and the sound of their own breathing. “And say what, Jacob?”

He bit back a growl. “Something. Anything. Tell her you don’t blame her, tell her you love her, tell her you’re not trying to punish her like she so clearly believes. She’s in pain, fucking help her.”

He felt John move closer, the tiny hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. Still, he didn’t turn around.

“I can’t.”

His fists clenched by his sides, but he kept his voice level and calm, “Why not?”

“Do you think I like seeing her like this? Do you think it doesn’t tear me apart to see her mourn for me? To see her blame herself? Do you think I enjoy it?” John snarled, mindful even in his anger to keep his voice down.

Jacob scoffed. “Then why won’t you talk to her?”

He was silent for a moment, and when Jacob finally looked at him, he found his younger brother staring down at Rook, looking at her like she was hope and salvation wrapped in one.

He knew the feeling. 

“I died, Jacob. I died and then I woke up and all I could think about was Rook and finding my way back to her. I can’t leave her, Jake, I won’t, not ever.” He reached out for her, his long, tattooed fingers hovering an inch away from her face, but reluctantly he pulled them away. “But whatever I am, I’m not her husband anymore. I can’t climb into bed with her at the end of the night and hold her, I can’t kiss away her pain or brush away her tears, I can’t touch her. I can’t be what she wants me to be and if I talk to her… those lines will blur and it’ll hurt her in the long run.” 

Jacob studied him for a long moment. “If you had your time again, would you still take those bullets, knowing you’d end up like this?” he finally asked. 

“Every single time, but you already knew that.”

Jacob nodded, rising from his seat on the edge of the bed with one last careful glance at Rook. 

“I don’t blame you, either.” 

John’s words brought him up short, faltering in his step just as he reached the doorway. He paused, the muscles in his shoulders and back tensing, but he didn’t look back. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“Yes, you do. You can’t help what you feel, Jacob. I know that better than anyone.” 

But Jacob just scoffed, shaking his head and stalking out of the room. 

Finally alone, John made his way to the other side of the bed, carefully sitting down on the mattress where his brother had just vacated. More than anything he longed to snuggle up beside Rook and run his fingers through her hair, pressing kisses along every inch of skin he could find like he usually did when she was upset. But all he could do now to comfort his wife was lean over and whisper in her ear, in the hope that maybe she’d remember some of it when she woke up.

“I will _always_ love you, Rook. None of this is your fault, it was _my choice_. I will always choose you, I will always protect you. I will _always_ follow you home.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it, leave some kudos or comments if you did :)


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